The one great thing that came out of this marriage, the kids, and now they are for all practical purposes, gone.When a couple divorce, it is because the relationship of the couple has essentially died.She has to deal with the emotional trauma of splitting with a spouse, he in contrast has to deal with the loss of a long term relationship with his spouse, he also has to deal with loss of the normal relationship with his children which may have been closer and far more intense then the spousal relationship ever was.
Even when she does not disagree and oppose it, and it is granted, it can be sabotaged and for various other reasons often does not work out.
She gave birth to these kids so she has decided these kids are hers and his role now is solely to assist her by providing money.
If she has not worked outside the home, she will likely get "spousal maintenance", a new politically correct title for "alimony".
He will be lucky to get to see the children every other weekend, or even less depending on how hostile she continues to be and what she can dream up as justification to hit em where it hurts, the kids.
The parents continue to whittle away, destroying each other.
If he dares to suggest that he plans to leave, she knows he loves his children and she often decides she can use this potentially losing contact with his children as a club, to keep him from leaving.Or she can use access to the children to punish him for leaving, or to use as a lever to control him to get what she wants in the settlement.He may think he can get joint custody, and that will solve it, but she will likely NOT agree to share custody with him..However, because of what he is doing to her by leaving, she will feel she is justified and the kid lever gives her power and gets his attention.He will be saddled with and continue to have to pay to support them even though he has little or no contact with the children..With three kids and an obligation thru college, can often cost him over 5,000.00.